A Short List of Things That the Australian...
The Melbourne Grand Prix: $97M (To bring in a profit of $36M) Fireworks: $14M (A conservative estimate of $10M for NYE and $1M for Australia Day) National Stay Safe Online Awareness Campaign: $10M Payouts to Politicians who lose the Election: $65M Concessions to Mining Companies to ‘Lessen the pain of the Mining and Mineral Resources Tax’: $4.7B. That’s a B for Billion,...
paulsdrivel asked: D: you don't do youtube anymore?
Ideas for Podcasts
Gaspin’ : my weekly round up of autoerotic asphyxiation news That’s all I got.
Are objectively disgusting, right? My uni’s hosting one but no one liked my poster idea. What’s wrong with “Foam Party: come get covered in a white goo, just like every other Friday”?
Coffee is a food, right?
So, to argue against the idea of film as a neuro-image, I’m going to need to read Deleuze. To understand him, I’m going to need to read Bergson. To understand him, I need to read Merleau-Ponty. To understand him, I need read Husserl. At what point in this philosophical circle jerk through time will I need to read Heiroglyphics? And will I need to have seen a cave painting on existence...
I Just Wanted to Watch Some Dirty Pictures! (No...
So, in my continued efforts to see ALL. THE. FILMS. and spend way too much time writing about the impact that Looper has on Gilles Deleuze’s theory of the time image (which, yes, I’m aware only I care about. See Looper. Seriously, it’s fucking fantastic) I took a class on censorship. I honestly just wanted to see some titties in a class setting, for reals. Which I totally did...
rennish: so i was trying to find the lyrics to a mountain goats song and i no one asked for your fuckin sass john darnielle
So apparently “your baby is so cute I would steal it” is not a compliment. Some people.
You and a member of the Tea Party are the only two people left on the planet. Which animal do you have sex with? I would definitly go for a sloth. They’d be by far the best at spooning.
Gordon Ramsay dwarf porn lookalike eaten by... →
gee--sus-deactivated20130203 asked: did you mean to misspell the "where"?...
divide-by-zero asked: YOU BACK!
my hollywood pitch
We give Adam Sandler’s career a gritty reboot in the blockbuster sequal Punch Drunk Love 2: 2 Drunk 2 Punch
I like to name my colds, so I get a greater sense of achievement when I beat them. For example, I am currently fighting a ‘Steve’. FUCK YOU STEVE.
Arrested Developent creator tells us how to get a... →
Decorative umbrellas in cocktails are more usefull than you think. They make your drink look pretty, AND they tell you when you’ve had too many drinks. For example: This is too many.
This happens about twice a week...
So today I learned to play Enter Sandman on ukulele (and yes, the first lesson is always how to spell ‘ukulele’). My housemates left me alone (the giddy fools!), so I decided I would rock out like a motherfucker. I got halfway through the chorus when I caught a glimpse in the mirror and realised I looked like an idiot with a midget guitar. A dirty idiot. So I spent the next twenty...
Things which I need to frequently remind myself of
Leaving a very hot hair straightener next to a can of hairspray is not so much “living on the edge” as “fucking stupid” and “transparently lazy” you do not have food in the house. You have a series of incompatible ingredients which you will never eat Not having cancerous moles doesn’t mean you “beat skin cancer”. It means that you avoided...
I realised how clean my blog has been as of late, a situation which I simply cannot allow. And so, please enjoy a list of the best porn-title puns I’ve ever heard. In Diana Jones and the Temple of Poon The ShawSkank re-invention Laurence of Her Labia Das Booty Glad-he-ate-her Men in Blacks The Wizard of Ahs Sore Riding Miss Daisy Drill Bill Aching Jaws Poke-a-hot-ass Phallus...
Something that has Always Bugged me
You know in films, when they reveal at the end of the second act that there’s a bomb? And no one knows how to diffuse it, and everyone’s all “Oh no, we’re all going to die!!” and then the hero remembers that his best friend happens to own a copy of the Bomb Encyclopaedia, so he calls his mate, and his mate’s all “cut the clue wire!”. The action hero...
Alanis Morisete’s Ironic is, in a metaphysical sense, an example of the correct usage of the word ironic. In that, it is ironic that a song called Ironic, and is based solely around giving examples of irony, contains exactly zero correct examples of irony. That slut.